Why children prefer dad

Chinese parents often like to ask the child for the problem, \"father and mother who is better, which one do you prefer? \"Children are often to\" better love \"to answer. In fact, in the hearts of children, parents \' status is not necessarily equal. At the recent 28th International Congress of psychology, held public forums, Zhang Jianxin research fellow, Institute of psychology, Chinese Academy of Sciences published a preliminary findings: by Beijing, Hebei, Shandong, according to a study of children in more than three to more than 1000 cities, urban children aged 6-12 in China there is a \"boring\" tendencies of the mother, and his father were relatively has become in the eyes of a child\'s \"hot ticket\".

\"Big and small\" MOM tube, I\'m fed up! \"Speak or write with substance\" Dad speak less, I listen!

\"Could you leave me? \"This is xiaoxin mother said a Word to bring him a fruit. Xiaoxin\'s mother is a typical modern mother, regardless of their students, interested in everything, even the life section on her one by one \"to do\". But the test results display, xiaoxin on mother emotion more distant, more eager to communicate with the father.

Professor Zhang Jianxin said, high or low frequency of communication with the children and emotional tendencies of children inside were not necessarily relevant. In modern life, father to spend more time and energy on career, education of child tasks often falls on the mother\'s body. But many mothers lack of education children\'s scientific method, you cannot really understand the child\'s inner world. Therefore, contact with deny or neglect of the child forms of the more, the more will result in child psychology, emotional conflict and boredom. For example, many mothers with their own expectations to require children, children do not meet the requirements will keep nagging, rebuke. Long, mother\'s attention, then not only would no longer be children, and may in the child form inside of a negative image, such as \"oblivious, endlessly.\"

Compared with the mother, because the father usually fewer child discipline, when children and father to be educated or more from a male perspective, focus on more important things, rather than the mother as \"exhaustive\". Therefore, the contact between children and fathers or cause a sense of strangeness, or have a sense of tolerance. Father\'s image in the minds of children is not so clear and strong mother.

Chinese parents how to deal with the relationship between the child and it? Reporter visited the China Youth University for political sciences youth work Department Director Chen Lisi.

Parents not to let the children live in one\'s own expectations, depends on the specific circumstances of the child, in accordance with their aptitude.

In the 6-12 children between the ages of the family, most of them are parents occupy a dominant position, it occurred mostly because of the parents of the parent-child relationship is not coordinated. Many parents not to seek truth from facts, the high asking a child to do something they don\'t like to do things, or unrealized wish to impose their own child. For example, forced children to learn various skills, achieve their required level, if a child falls short on the use of sarcasm, even scolding method. These are actually a psychological abuse, not only to the effect, but will harm the child. In fact, when it comes to these things is essentially due to the parents as a result of lack of social security, they worry about their children, is also a lack of confidence in their future performance.

At the same time, there are many parents lack of proper teaching methods, blindly believe in some claims, such as \"don\'t let children lost at the starting line\". In fact, for each child, according to different characteristics of his own abilities, there is a Chinese word is called a late bloomer, so on the starting line of winning or losing is not an issue at all. There are many parents believed that without high education or child could not be based in the community since, so when a child was very young when they were \"determined\" to let your child read master and doctor, has been asking them to take part in enhanced Edition, tutorial. In fact, these views are totally misleading of the social, and not really understand the situation of China\'s talent market.

To complete the child as a person, respecting them, give them a free development of the space.

Many parents think the good child care is a responsibility that this belief is wrong. Many parents feel when eaten in China, and never let the children to suffer, so all aspects of life in children to interfere in one tube, lest child knock, touch, fully control up to the kids from head to toe, sometimes all day long \"oblivious, endlessly.\" So the final can only be stifled children originally happy, lively childhood life.

In fact, is to eat, some setbacks for children is not necessarily a bad thing, and how do not feel failed to understand the real happiness. Therefore, as a parent to the child as a complete person, should learn to understand them, respect them and give them adequate development space, let them show themselves, know yourself.